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A Changed Look at Overwhelm

Today I want to talk about something every woman I know has felt — but few of us fully understand: overwhelm. It’s more than being busy. It’s more than being tired.
Overwhelm happens when our heart, our mind, and our nervous system get pushed past the point of what we can hold. I want to be very honest because many of you already know part of our story.
My husband and I live with our adult son who has a severe mental illness. He has episodes — sudden, loud, sometimes destructive — and every one of them is unpredictable. There have been nights when I’ve prayed instantly, and God calms him.
And there have been nights when I thought, “Lord, I don’t even want to pray. I’m tired. I want out of this.” That moment taught me something powerful about overwhelm — and it’s a lesson that can help women with all kinds of intense emotions, whether grief, anxiety, frustration, or anger. SECTION 1 — Feeling Overwhelmed vs. Being Overwhelmed Let’s start with a key distinction: Feeling overwhelm is the body’s signal. It’s a natural response to pressure, intensity, or emotional load. Being overwhelmed is what happens when we identify with the feeling and believe a story about it. Think of it like a kitchen smoke alarm: The beeping = the feeling of overwhelm (signal). The thought, “I’m a terrible cook because the alarm went off” = being overwhelmed (sentence, judgment, story). When you’re feeling overwhelmed, your body is telling you: “Something needs adjustment. I need breath, space, or rest.” When you are being overwhelmed, your mind says: “I can’t handle this. Something is wrong with me. I’m failing.” Feeling overwhelmed is neutral, informative, and actionable.
Being overwhelmed is judgmental, identity-based, and disempowering.